Swell

July 14, 2010emily 1 Comment »

I bought a new bra from Victoria’s Secret the other day. It was, from the catalog description, exactly what I was looking for. Nothing fancy, nothing complicated (if you’ve seen some of the bras they’re offering, you know what I mean). Plus, it was on sale. Bonus! Then I noticed something else in the description: swell, it said. “Swell: lightly lined.” Great, I thought! I don’t want anything padded or pushed or even pumped. It seemed like the right, er, fit for me. And then it arrived. Swell: lightly lined? More like, swell: implants. I looked in the mirror and, what the hell? Suddenly I looked more like Dolly Parton than myself. I sent it back. Swell indeed!

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